I’d like the breathing to cease

Skin that once was chocolate
Is raisins lately.
I sit and count the wrinkles around the sockets
That had eyes shimmering with purpose
Once.
Now
There are hollow grey mouths of guns
Shooting out vacant stares towards me
That pierce the soul
For hours;
Sometimes days.

I wonder
How long does a day feel
When the breaths you take are fabricated through machinery?
How lengthy is an hour
That battles with air every second?
The belly
I witness inflating,
With pumped breaths,
Rattles every organ there,
Also,
Every organ here;
Within me.

Steak,
I see in a magazine
And then gaze
At the wretched food pipe:
One of the plenty
Attached to the limbs.
“Food or Sex?”
“Food!” I’d hear with laughs.
Food or Breaths?
Who knew,
Would be the options.

Treatment,
They call it:
Prolonging of pain
I deduce.
No words for months,
No songs,
No fights;
Not even humming.
Just
Fake breathing and beeps
Breathing
Beep
Breathing
Beep.

I breathe twice instinctively
Amidst every beep,
First for her,
Then for me.
Silly assistance;
Futile, I know.
But every desperate gasp for air,
Is her
Disguised agony.

I’d like, O lord, to hear now
Just the shattering
Beep
Beep
Beep.
I pray and plead to you O Lord,
I’d like the breathing
To finally cease.
Won’t you hear
These desperate calls
And
A mother’s plea?
All I want for her is now
The drowning to be
Complete.

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